UK Jails Woman Over Facebook Post, Iraq Legalizes Marrying 9-Year-Old Girls?, Parks & Rec Alum Attempts Parody Song, Gets Destroyed (The Five for 08/09/24)
John Wick 4 gets a sequel...TV show! The Killers are back. Apple TV+ serves up another brilliant thriller.
Hey, welcome to The Five, a publication about the stories that matter.
It’s Friday, so let’s dive into Culture & Commentary.
[one]
As a response to riots in the UK, the British “Constables” are now arresting people for social media posts…and are blocking Americans from viewing the info.
From chesire.police.uk (you need a VPN set to the UK for the link to work)
Officers from Cheshire Police have arrested a woman in relation to social media post containing inaccurate information about the identity of the attacker in the Southport murders.
The 55-year-old woman from near Chester, was arrested earlier today, Thursday 8 August, on suspicion of publishing written material to stir up racial hatred (S19 of the Public Order Act 1986) and false communications (S179 Online Safety Act 2023).
She is currently being held in police custody where she is assisting officers with their enquiries.
Chief Superintendent Alison Ross said:
“We have all seen the violent disorder that has taken place across the UK over the past week, much of which has been fuelled by malicious and inaccurate communications online.
“It’s a stark reminder of the dangers of posting information on social media platforms without checking the accuracy. It also acts as a warning that we are all accountable for our actions, whether that be online or in person.”
So far…the American press has been silent about this. Horrific. Free speech is dying before our eyes, and our press can’t be bothered to write an article.
[two]
Political discourse took some very strange turns this week, when Nick Offerman (Parks & Rec, The Last of Us) tried to parody J.D. Vance and Donald Trump, and maybe tried to convince the public he was a former Republican?
And I don't mind sex with porn stars, I'd do it anyway. If I had the guts, but when it comes to f ing the furniture, well that's just f ing nuts. So I'm proud to be a Kamala man who has quit the GOP.
Cause I just can't abide a man who's tried for 34 felonies. And it's time to stand up. And face the fact that the men that I once cheered Are a bunch of wingnut white nationalists Boy, those guys are f ing weird
The J.D. Vance “furniture” meme just won’t die, despite the fact that it was just a troll post on X, which has now been used by Tim Walz. What’s striking about Offerman’s fail here…is just how flat the whole parody falls. Nick Offerman is hilarious, which is proven by the ongoing popularity of Park & Rec, which ended a nearly a decade ago.
But Nick can’t see what the public find funny, because he’s driven by a Jihadist style religious rage over the election.
Elsewhere, women were going viral for dressing up as cats and carrying around litter. I’m not sure I understand the symbolism here, as I have a cat…and he can’t carry anything. He doesn’t have hands.
The visual is…memorable.
If you’re wondering how people got so strange (sorry, “weird” being the buzzword of the 2024 election), look at the language being used…which is religious.
But partisan politics, even democracy itself…makes a really poor subsitute for God, put so eloquently by Andrew Snyder on X:
The freedom to vote is not sacred. At best, it is the best way we have found to select leaders, and even that is not self-evident. When democracy becomes religion, we isolate ourselves from very real hierarchies that make up the chain of being, which is where value is found. Despair is the result. It is not without reason that C.S. Lewis portrayed Hell as cosmic isolation.
Of course, the play for Republicans should be talking mostly about inflation’s effect on gas and grocery prices. Instead, Donald Trump Jr. is dropping equally crass (click at your own risk) jokes on Twitter about Tim Walz.
All one side has do to win is not be crazy. Not alienate people. Be normal.
And nobody can figure out how to do that.
[three]
There’s only one kind of person who can look at a picture of Iraqi girls that age and think “marriage material.” A pedophile. Well, the pedos in Iraq are having a great week, where a law is being pushed through to drop the minimum age of marriage for girls to 9 years old.
From The National:
“Would politicians let their nine-year-old daughter get married? I’m sure not but they would allow the oppressed Iraqi population to do so,” Suhalia Al Assam, a women’s rights activist, told The National on Wednesday, amid outrage caused by proposed amendments to Iraq's Personal Status Law.
If passed, the changes, pushed by mostly Islamist Shiite parliamentarians, could legalise child marriages and allow for personal status matters to be ruled on the basis of sectarian law.
Critics of the amendments fear this could fuel sectarianism in the country and empower religious clerics over civil courts.
The Iraqi parliament held its first reading of the bill on Sunday, causing immediate criticism as a protest is expected to be held in Baghdad on Thursday afternoon to denounce the proposed changes. In order for a bill to become binding it must have three readings, be debated thoroughly and then a vote will be held unanimously.
And it’s not just an Iraqi problem.
From a report on CNN:
Many are shocked by the news that Iraq’s parliament is about to lower the marriage age for girls from 15 to 9. There are examples from other countries too. In Sudan it’s 10 In Afghanistan & Yemen, it’s from “puberty” but in reality 6, 7 and 8-year-old girls are also married off
As with the story on free speech in the UK…where is the American outcry here? Where are all those liberals screaming about the Iraq War in 2008? (oh yeah, they only care about pronoun battles now). Where are the pro life evangelicals?
The most extreme thing I’ll ever write in this publication is that perhaps the west should crowdfund terrorism against adult men who marry elementary school girls in developing nations.
Put up $100 to see the “groom” (rapists) head on a pike, and the “bride” (kidnap victim) returned to her family. That right there isn’t just justice…it’s investing in a local economy.
[four]
Dang, summer is almost over…but summer movies are finally filling up movie theaters, with Twisters and Deadpool and Wolverine generating back-to back-box office hits after pretty much every theatrical release flopped in May and June.
This weekend could be big thanks to an intra-marriage rivalry.
From The Hollywood Reporter:
Wife-and-husband duo Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds are creating their own Barbenheimer moment at the box office as Lively’s new movie It Ends With Us goes up against Reynolds’ blockbuster Deadpool & Wolverine.
Sony’s female-fueled It Ends With Us earned a huge $7 million in Thursday previews, confirming speculation that the film would do much more business than predicted. Tracking services, along with Sony, had suggested the movie would open to $23 million over the Aug. 9-11 weekend, while exhibitors thought more along the lines of $40 million based on presales. Others thought $50 million or more.
If you’re able to see a movie in the theater…please do. It’s gonna be a worse world if streaming is our only option.
[five]
As always, let’s head into the weekend with a pop culture roundup:
John Wick 4 is getting a sequel…TV show. Series writer/director Chad Stahelski is in the leading the effort, and writing with The Old Man (a seriously underrated show, and one of my favorite novels) co-creator Robert Levine. Excellent.
HBO let go of a whopping seven seconds of footage from the upcoming Game of Thrones spinoff A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms. For once, Hollywood cast an actually tall person (the 6’5” Peter Claffey of Vikings: Valhalla) to play Ser Duncan the Tall, the series lead. Never forget that before Reacher was a hit on Prime Video, it was a 2012 action movie in which the 5’7” Tom Cruise played the 6’6” Jack Reacher (according to the novels). Us actually tall people have been dramatically under-represented on screen.
Saoirse Ronan (Ladybird, Little Women) plays an alcoholic struggling to stay sober on an outlying island chain in Scotland. The Outrun looks great, if you’re into really depressing indie movies. If not, keep scrolling. Trailer.
A couple of documentaries that look pretty great, if you’re into those. A MAN CALLED HURT (trailer) explores the life of Mississippi John Hurt, a 1920’s era bluesman who had a huge impact on pop and country music in later decades. And if you grew up obsessed with the movie Tombstone (like I did) Wyatt Earp and the Cowboy War (trailer) looks like a lot of fun, exploring the facts and narrative behind of one of the most well known true American myths. Both on Netflix.
Dang. The Last of Us is by far the most popular TV show based on a video game. Roughly a year and a half the series debuted, we’re finally getting a look at what’s coming for the second season.
If you liked the show but haven’t played the games…prepare for mild disappointment. There are only two games, so this is likely the end of the story. No release date yet.
UPDATE: In regards to game/show crossovers, there are no numbers on how many new players The Last of Us show brought to the game, but we do have that stat for Fallout on Prime Video, in which the show increased XBOX users playing the game by 4x.
Director James Mangold (Logan, Ford v Ferrari) taking on the life of Bob Dylan was enough to get me excited due to the director’s work bringing Johnny Cash to the big screen with Walk the Line.
That was before I heard Timothee Chalamet (Interstellar, Dune), in the lead role of the legendary folk singer, open his mouth and sing.
Somehow, Chalamet is a dead ringer for Dylan, just like Joaquin Phoenix (Joker, Signs) captured the vocal qualities of Johnny Cash.
Out sometime around Christmas.
It’s tough to figure out what’s going on with Disclaimer from the trailer, so I’m going to throw it to the official description:
. When she receives a novel from an unknown author, she is horrified to realize she is now the main character in a story that exposes her darkest secrets.
This is a “limited series,” so it’s seven episodes and done. Good.
I was pretty critical of Apple TV+ based on the trailers of their first round of shows and movies…only to actually sign up and love basically everything they’re putting out. In my opinion, Apple has exceeded HBO for prestige TV in recent years (the latter puts out a lot of crap I don’t have any interest in), which is why I’m bummed that Apple is cutting their entertainment production budget. If you haven’t tried it out yet, Apple TV+ has a heck of a lot of good stuff to catch up on.
[new music]
The latest single from The Killers leans into their keyboard heavy signature sound…and deserves to play on the highway, windows down…and wait for the Gospel backup singers to belt out the chorus.
Justin Townes Earle was a pioneer of the explosion of alt-country /Americana that’s dominating the charts. Sadly, Justin, who had lived sober for years, relapsed and overdosed on opioids during the COVID lockdowns (read: the government killed him with negligence).
A collection of b-sides and rarities curated by Justin’s father, 80’s alt-country legend and Grammy winner Steve Earle.
Until the next one,
-sth