Elon Musk Gets Catfished (By Someone I Know), Kevin Costner Kills off Yellowstone, AMC Raises Prices on The "Good Seats" at the Movie Theater (The Five for 02/10/23)
Hey, welcome to The Five, a publication about the stories that matter…but may not make the front page.
Before we dive in, a few lightning fast product reviews.
(Note: I do these because they get a pretty good response—these are not affiliate links. Just my raw feedback for your consideration on products you may use).
First up, my dog’s FI collar broke last year, and I haven’t replaced it (yet—may decided to go back to Fi). Instead, I attached a ByteTag to his collar—a dog tag with a QR code that provides your info when it’s scanned. ByteTag then sends you a notification of where the scanned happened—so you can go get your dog. If you’re getting one for a larger dog (like mine), I recommend the Silicone Tag.
UPDATE: The tag ripped off in less than a week. So, maybe this is a good idea for small dogs.
Secondly, I promised a review of Motion, the smart scheduling app that builds your calendar/task list for you—so that you get everything done. Their tagline is “there are now 13 months in the year.”
Don’t believe the hype about the Motion App. It’s lame—$34/month gets your very little (to nothing) that you couldn’t do with a notepad and Gmail or Outlook calendar. I had moderate hopes that this would be a game changer—it just isn’t.
It’s Friday, so let’s dive into Culture & Commentary.
[one]
And just like that…the biggest show on TV is coming to an end, due to the star wanting out.
Yellowstone will end in it’s current form, and likely launch into a spinoff show anchored by Matthew McConaughey (Dallas Buyer’s Club, Magic Mike), which is likely a spin-off (and not a continuation) because the show is under a bad streaming deal that doesn’t allow it on the Paramount+ streaming network, where Yellowstone prequels 1883 and 1923 live.
The 68-year-old Costner is taking a huge risk, leaving the blockbuster series to work on a series of new Western movies he will direct and act in.
Movieweb reports:
The sheer scale of the project's plot, which will cover a 15-year period in four large parts, will provide an intimate portrait of settlement in the West before and after the Civil War. The film series will apparently not gloss over this period either, or tell it purely from the perspective of the cowboys. A significant portion of the plot is said to center around the indigenous communities that also lived through this fractious period of history, and suffered greatly during it too.
As if all this wasn't enough, the cast is as epic as the story promises to be, with over 170 characters. With the likes of Costner himself, Sienna Miller, Sam Worthington, Jamie Campbell Bower, Luke Wilson, Thomas Haden Church, Jena Malone, Alejandro Edda, Tatanka Means, Michael Rooker, and Isabelle Fuhrman all being involved, the ambitious project looks set to be massive in every way. Costner has of course proven to be made for Westerns and dramatic cowboy roles, so it seems yet another ideal fit for the now 68-year-old veteran actor.
As a fan of Yellowstone from the series pilot, I’m not sad to see it wrap up. Five seasons is a good run, and creator Taylor Sheridan gets to open a new chapter…while Kevin Costner takes a shot at making his career-defining project.
[two]
Well, this is a strange one. An uber-popular online influencer and “human trafficking advocate” had a massive fall from grace this week, when strong evidence came out that “Eliza Bleau” (not her real name) made the whole thing up.
Stranger still…there’s a chance I might know Eliza?! We’ll get to that next.
Unherd.com reports:
Bleu publicly shared her story for the first time on a podcast in September of 2020, where she recounted a sheltered upbringing on an Illinois farm, before a rebellious phase when she met a photographer who lured her to Los Angeles with promises of stardom. On the trip, the 17-year-old was drugged, assaulted, and groomed before being sold to a “much older gentleman” for $500. The strange tale that follows includes a stint in a band, an abusive marriage, and multiple escapes from, and then returns to, “the life,” when she’d fall in with “new crowds of traffickers”. According to the podcast, she finally got out in 2014, after watching survivors tell their stories online. The details of events are vague and circumspect, and Bleu is wholly unable to place them on a timeline, which she explains is the result of the effects of trauma on the brain.
One of the biggest problems with Bleau allegedly being kidnapped and forced into prostitution in LA is that she was living in Chicago at that time, and later was music video girl…under various aliases.
But it’s hard to reconcile that with Eliza Morthland, the beloved daughter of a wealthy Illinois politician, or Eliza Cuts, the popular hairstylist in Chicago’s rock scene, or Eliza Knows, the rap video “vixen” who taped herself gloating to her mother about starring in one. The profile doesn’t even fit comfortably with Eliza Bleu, the anti-trafficking advocate who lashes out at podcast hosts with basic questions about the story that informs all her work.
Eliza’s untrue stories led to personal meetings with Elon Musk to discuss how to fight Twitter being used by criminal Sex Traffickers.
But then, the story got really weird (and personal). Eliza Morthland (her real name) grew up on a farm just outside Moline, IL, where I spent my high school years. After conversations with my high school friends it appears that Eliza and I likely crossed paths at some point in our teenage years (although it’s hard for me to tell if I recognize her with all the face fillers) as I believe she was a cheerleader for an opposing high school basketball team and may have actually dated a high school basketball rival that went on to be a college teammate of mine.
On one hand, a personal connection to the alleged con artist didn't matter much.
On the other, it personalizes the story, because it's not just some internet rando that stole attention (and likely money) that should have gone to real victims… it's a person who started out life more or less like me… and went down a very dark path, one lie at a time.
I started out researching this story disgusted and horrified…and I ended it… humbled.
Because Eliza does not deserve to be internet famous ever again. She should go do what the rest of us do… and make a living outside of being an online celebrity.
But I regret that my first reaction about the story was so harsh. Because if I am recalling events correctly, I may have had a casual conversation with Eliza, it forces me to see her as a person, not an internet meme…I moved from anger to wanting to tell her no one is beyond the grip of grace.
Which is a better way to respond to all public falls from grace, rather than piling on in the comments section.
Because, but for the Grace of God, there go I.
[three]
In a time when audiences are JUST getting back to the local multiplex, AMC had the brilliant idea to charge different amounts for seats—just like a concert or sporting event.
It’s like they want to drive themselves out of business or something.
If AMC isn’t the only choice for a theater in a town…why would anyone go there, when the experience is going to be more or less the same for a cheaper price somewhere else?
[four]
The most interesting to watch the Super Bowl Sunday may not be in Kansas City or Philadephia, but Cleveland Heights, OH, a small city covering just 8 square miles…because Cleveland Heights is the first town in America to produce players on opposing teams for a Super Bowl.
Oh yeah, and Travis and Jason Kelce…are brothers.
The Kansas City Star reports:
They will wear uniforms representing their hopeful cities — Travis, 33, an eight-time Pro Bowl tight end, a likely shoo-in for the Pro Football Hall of Fame, in Kansas City Chiefs red; Jason, 35, a center, with Hall of Fame bona fides of his own, in Philadelphia Eagles green. But what the people in Cleveland Heights know is the Kelces also will be representing them.
At night, Heights High School and its white clock tower are lit like a tabernacle at Christmas: Chiefs red on the west side, Eagles green on the east. It’s no matter that the Kelces no longer live in town. Travis in KC: “Right now,” his dad said, “he doesn’t see himself living anyplace else.” He said Travis told him, in fact, that if he were ever traded, he’d probably quit the NFL.
Although the brothers now live in KC and Philly, respectively, they have a podcast who’s name nods to their beloved hometown, New Heights with Jason & Travis Kelce. You can check out next week’s episode to hear their experiences facing off in the most watched contest in American sports.
[five]
Screenrant did a survey of the most anticipated Super Bowl trailers. I uhhh…re-ranked them according to my preferences. If you can’t read my handwriting, the new Pixar’s Elemental received a rating of “meh” while the Transformers flick gets a “nah.” Scream VI and The Little Mermaid (live action) get a rating of “apathy.”
I remember tearing out of movie theater parking lot after seeing The Fast & The Furious in 2001, in the passenger seat of my best friend’s tuned up ‘68 Camero. The movie, starring then-newcomer Vin Diesal and Paul Walker, who had a teen rom-com (She’s All That) and a teen football movie (Varsity Blues) wasn’t expected to do much.
Twenty two years later…the 10th entry into the franchise will be one of the biggest commercials at the Super Bowl.
Will Fast X have a “plot”? Not one you’ll remember. But the cars will zoom zoom and something-something-vaguely-spy-ish will happen, and you’ll have a great time. Or, you hate this franchise, and can ignore. Either one is acceptable.
Matt Damon and Ben Affleck reuniting to hopefully recapture the magic of their on-screen partnership in Good Will Hunting? And the movie is about the birth of the Air Jordan shoe?
I mean…did somebody sit down and write on a piece of paper “what will get Seth in Missouri to a theater?” Cause this would be the answer.
Not that it was needed…but bonus points for Jason Batemen (Ozark, Arrested Development) joining the cast.
The music-to-movies crossover doesn’t always go well (ok, almost never goes well—most musicians can’t act), but Jack Harlow may prove to be a multi-faceted talent with a remake of the White Men Can’t Jump. The 1992 original starred Woody Harrelson, Wesley Snipes and Rosie Perez in a story about gambling and street basketball, and is remembered fondly by late Gen-Xers/Elder Millennials (or, among my friends at least).
This one goes straight to Hulu on May 19th. No full trailer yet, but a 30 second first clip dropped.
Don’t judge an album by it’s cover—the latest from Americana outfit Sundy Best looks like the sonics would intentionally be 90’s retro—but what you’ll find here is a strong batch of songs that leans slightly towards the Appalachian mountain sounds than most projects that could loosely be lumped in with Zach Bryan/Tyler Childers et. al.
Until the next one,
-sth